I’ve been praying about my next writing and looking back on my whirlwind week, it became clear that I can no longer navigate my days as I did before my illness.
So...when we come face-to-face with a life change and it’s clear we must operate differently, what does this look like? Maybe you recently had a big move and now you are facing the daunting challenge of starting fresh somewhere new - new enrichment activities, new community, heck even a new grocery store. Maybe you are facing a change in your family relationships or a new schedule with a new job. We look at our home and our children and we can feel smothered by a mountain of the unknown, the “how in the world will I get through this?” “where do I even start?”
First, we pave the way for this new journey by seeking the help of the One who already knows the way.
For me, I have had to be honest about tasks I can no longer do safely when I am having a bad body day. Some days just brushing my teeth is a challenge which means I have had to let go of ‘my’ control of ‘my’ day and I’ve had to get comfortable with putting the day in His hands. (Which is a much better place to be anyway, thank you Lord for this precious lesson)
Many wise homeschooling mom’s have given such life giving advice on this subject - we must simplify and be open to flexibility!
Asking for help and admitting that I can longer complete a task as planned has never been my natural tendency. As I imagine His loving sense of humor, He has used this past year as my crash course in humility. I have lost track of the countless times I’ve had to rely on help from my family. My husband (on top of starting his own business) especially, has had to carry a much heavier load. We lovingly call him our “chauffeur” on the days when I can not drive and we have to wait to run our errands until he gets home. That sweet man has made more runs to the library for our innumerable hold alerts then I can count! My whole grocery routine has changed as well, what did we ever do before pickup orders or grocery delivery!? There are times during the day when I can completely run out of gas and I have no choice but to stop and rest, so, I’ve learned to plan for my energy crash as well. My normal household tasks have now become a challenge and it has caused me to change the whole rhythm of our day. What does this look like? It means my old time-clock-task-list of getting our lessons done and out of the way, has been thrown out the window and we work at a pace that leaves breathing room and flexibility for the unexpected. During this season of change we don’t have a lot of “extra fluff” in our plans.
We are in charge of keeping everyone alive and fed and clothed and ensuring there are no sibling death matches, oh yeah and to make sure learning is happening and then we splash in a life changing event, and it can really makes us understand what we truly value in our homeschool. There are parts we love about our day, (maybe its starting your morning with a board game, or taking a bike ride to get the blood pumping) and then there parts we know we can leave flexible. On my good feeling days I can fall into the trap of trying to do as much catch up as I can before I feel debilitated again - and then I over do it and I feel right back where I started. I’ve learned to let tasks go, to simplify, to be thankful for help when I have it and to not be too proud to enjoy and be grateful for the gift God has provided.
It is hard to be vulnerable and to ask for help, but God will bless you though it and I believe He is opening new doors for us when we walk forward in our humble faith, trusting Him to provide. At the beginning of this year, I felt devastated with all the activities we had to stop and the friends we lost because our world had completely changed,(and it was all because of me!). But, all these months later, though the fruit is still growing, I can see the fruit and the new life that God has been faithfully tending. Though, I still can not see around the bend, I have seen His faithfulness enough in my life to know that I can trust my unknown with Him and that He will finish what He has started.
“He who calls you is faithful, who also will do it.” 1 Thessalonians 5:24
So where do I put all my mama worries about my family and how my homeschool is doing this year? I place them in His hands.
“Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You will revive me; You will stretch out Your hand against the wrath of my enemies, and Your right hand will save me. The Lord will perfect that which concerns me; Your mercy, O Lord, endures forever; do not forsake the works of Your hands.” Psalm 138:7-8